Things not to do on your 38th birthday:

* Count your gray hairs
* Calculate 40 minus your current age
* Re-live a flashback of your athletic dominance from 20 years ago
* Go to the young folks club and pretend that you are still cool
* Eat a bunch of cake etc. You don’t want to know how cardio you would have to do…
* Admit that your parents were right. I still have 2 more years of denial